Explore OxonDads
Being a Dad
Early Days
Breast-feeding
With lots of research stating that ‘breast is best’ encourage your partner to look into this option for feeding your baby. There are lots of advantages to breast feeding and more advice can be obtained by your midwife or at your local children’s centre in or baby café.
Tips from OxonDads
• Breastfeeding requires no preparation, no heating, no bottles or dishes you have to wash.
• It's free - and formula isn't cheap.
• Breast milk never runs out and you never have to deal with leftovers.
• Not everyone can breastfeed confidently. If your partner is having difficulty in breastfeeding you can both talk with your Midwife or Health Visitor who can give advice on what to do and may suggest other options.
• Breastfeeding is good for your partner, giving her chance to bond with the baby.
• Breastfeeding is good for your baby. Breast milk contains the perfect blend of nutrients.
• Breastfed babies have a much lower tendency than formula-fed babies do to develop food allergies and respiratory and gastrointestinal illnesses, and they are less likely to become obese as adults. Breast milk also transmits the mother's immunity to certain diseases.
• Breastfed babies' nappies don't smell as bad.
Early Days
Breast-feeding
With lots of research stating that ‘breast is best’ encourage your partner to look into this option for feeding your baby. There are lots of advantages to breast feeding and more advice can be obtained by your midwife or at your local children’s centre in or baby café.
Tips from OxonDads
• Breastfeeding requires no preparation, no heating, no bottles or dishes you have to wash.
• It's free - and formula isn't cheap.
• Breast milk never runs out and you never have to deal with leftovers.
• Not everyone can breastfeed confidently. If your partner is having difficulty in breastfeeding you can both talk with your Midwife or Health Visitor who can give advice on what to do and may suggest other options.
• Breastfeeding is good for your partner, giving her chance to bond with the baby.
• Breastfeeding is good for your baby. Breast milk contains the perfect blend of nutrients.
• Breastfed babies have a much lower tendency than formula-fed babies do to develop food allergies and respiratory and gastrointestinal illnesses, and they are less likely to become obese as adults. Breast milk also transmits the mother's immunity to certain diseases.
• Breastfed babies' nappies don't smell as bad.
Childcare and activities for disabled children and
young people and those with additional needs:
All provision for families should be welcoming to all children, ensuring that
wherever possible children are not excluded because they are disabled or have
additional needs. However, parents may still struggle to access appropriate
provision for their disabled child for a variety of reasons.
Parents and carers who are finding it difficult to locate or access the childcare services that they need should seek support from Oxfordshire Family Information Service (OxonFIS). The Accessible Childcare Information Officer based at OxonFIS can assist parents in accessing childcare, play and leisure opportunities as well as providing information and support on a range of topics affecting families with disabled children and young people who are in mainstream settings. Information on funding available and local support groups for parents and families is also available. Contact the Accessible Childcare Information Officer on 08452 26 26 36.
If the child/young person attends a special school, parents and carers should contact the school’s Out of School Liaison Officer (OSLO) who can support them to locate and access childcare services.
‘Your Child and You’ is a free resource guide produced by OxonFIS for parents of disabled children and young people or those who have additional needs. Please contact OxonFIS on 08452 262636 if you would like a copy. This resource can also be viewed online at www.oxonfis.org.uk in the ‘Parents of Disabled Children’ section.
Nappy Changing
Changing your baby's nappies regularly is important, otherwise skin can get sore. Expect to do it before or after every feed (except at night), plus when they have had a poo. Babies poo several times daily to begin with, and wee every one to three hours - keep checking! If you are unsure, ask your partner or midwife - don’t worry; we all had to learn. The first few will be challenging but with a baby needing 8-10 changes a day, you will soon become a pro!
Tips from OxonDads
• Nappy changing can be shared between parents. When dads take turns it can take the pressure off Mum.
• Nappy changing is a great time for dads to get close with their babies; to coo, sing, laugh and bond at the same time.
• Hands on dads change nappies!
Baby Blues
For a woman the period after birth can be full of confusion, anxiety, and change. It is no surprise to find that women are often depressed in the time following birth. “Baby blues" is a term used to describe feeling weepy and highly emotional for a day or two following the baby's birth. This is very common and it is at this stage when a dad’s support is invaluable. It is also common for dads to feel the same way. It could be helpful to use your Paternity Leave to spend more time together when you need it the most.
Post Natal Depression (PND)
PND is a form of clinical depression which can affect women, and less frequently men, after childbirth. Studies report prevalence (delete) rates among women from 5% to 25%, and among men, in particular new fathers, depression has been estimated to affect between 1% and 25%. Postnatal depression occurs in women after they have carried a child, usually in the first few months, and may last up to several months or even a year. Symptoms include sadness, fatigue, changes in sleeping and eating patterns, reduced libido, crying episodes, anxiety, and irritability. Many women recover with a treatment consisting of a support group or counselling. The effect of a mother’s depression on a growing child can be long-lasting. Advice on how to help both mother and child is available from your health visitor.
Tips from OxonDads
• Talk with each other sharing how each of you feels.
• This is not something you and your partner should have to cope with alone, and it is important that you talk this through and see your doctor, who will help. Do not suffer in silence
• Get help and advice on how to make sure that your child gets the love and care it needs despite your partner’s depression
young people and those with additional needs:
All provision for families should be welcoming to all children, ensuring that
wherever possible children are not excluded because they are disabled or have
additional needs. However, parents may still struggle to access appropriate
provision for their disabled child for a variety of reasons.
Parents and carers who are finding it difficult to locate or access the childcare services that they need should seek support from Oxfordshire Family Information Service (OxonFIS). The Accessible Childcare Information Officer based at OxonFIS can assist parents in accessing childcare, play and leisure opportunities as well as providing information and support on a range of topics affecting families with disabled children and young people who are in mainstream settings. Information on funding available and local support groups for parents and families is also available. Contact the Accessible Childcare Information Officer on 08452 26 26 36.
If the child/young person attends a special school, parents and carers should contact the school’s Out of School Liaison Officer (OSLO) who can support them to locate and access childcare services.
‘Your Child and You’ is a free resource guide produced by OxonFIS for parents of disabled children and young people or those who have additional needs. Please contact OxonFIS on 08452 262636 if you would like a copy. This resource can also be viewed online at www.oxonfis.org.uk in the ‘Parents of Disabled Children’ section.
Nappy Changing
Changing your baby's nappies regularly is important, otherwise skin can get sore. Expect to do it before or after every feed (except at night), plus when they have had a poo. Babies poo several times daily to begin with, and wee every one to three hours - keep checking! If you are unsure, ask your partner or midwife - don’t worry; we all had to learn. The first few will be challenging but with a baby needing 8-10 changes a day, you will soon become a pro!
Tips from OxonDads
• Nappy changing can be shared between parents. When dads take turns it can take the pressure off Mum.
• Nappy changing is a great time for dads to get close with their babies; to coo, sing, laugh and bond at the same time.
• Hands on dads change nappies!
Baby Blues
For a woman the period after birth can be full of confusion, anxiety, and change. It is no surprise to find that women are often depressed in the time following birth. “Baby blues" is a term used to describe feeling weepy and highly emotional for a day or two following the baby's birth. This is very common and it is at this stage when a dad’s support is invaluable. It is also common for dads to feel the same way. It could be helpful to use your Paternity Leave to spend more time together when you need it the most.
Post Natal Depression (PND)
PND is a form of clinical depression which can affect women, and less frequently men, after childbirth. Studies report prevalence (delete) rates among women from 5% to 25%, and among men, in particular new fathers, depression has been estimated to affect between 1% and 25%. Postnatal depression occurs in women after they have carried a child, usually in the first few months, and may last up to several months or even a year. Symptoms include sadness, fatigue, changes in sleeping and eating patterns, reduced libido, crying episodes, anxiety, and irritability. Many women recover with a treatment consisting of a support group or counselling. The effect of a mother’s depression on a growing child can be long-lasting. Advice on how to help both mother and child is available from your health visitor.
Tips from OxonDads
• Talk with each other sharing how each of you feels.
• This is not something you and your partner should have to cope with alone, and it is important that you talk this through and see your doctor, who will help. Do not suffer in silence
• Get help and advice on how to make sure that your child gets the love and care it needs despite your partner’s depression
Useful Links
• For Early Years and Childcare, Parenting Support, School Admissions andsupport for families with disabled children:
• Oxfordshire Family Information Services: www.oxonfis.org.uk or call 08452 26 26 36
• For parenting groups, offering help with parenting, and Whole Family Programmes where children/young people come to, contact:
• Parenting Development Team on : 01865 876624
• Parent-Talk for parents of teenagers: 01865 875482
• For FREE independent education advice for 15-16 year olds: ACE Advisory
Centre for Education www.ace-ed.org.uk
• For information about health matters, the following links provide a wealth of information for Dads about parenting and fatherhood:
• For information about health matters: www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk or call 0845 4647
• The following links provide a wealth of information for Dads about parenting and fatherhood:
• www.talktoyourbaby.org.uk/dads
• www.dadtalk.co.uk
• www.young-fathers.org.uk
• www.dad.info
• www.oxpip.org.uk
• www.teenadvice.about.com
• www.parentchannel.tv
• www.daddybegood.com/
• For Early Years and Childcare, Parenting Support, School Admissions andsupport for families with disabled children:
• Oxfordshire Family Information Services: www.oxonfis.org.uk or call 08452 26 26 36
• For parenting groups, offering help with parenting, and Whole Family Programmes where children/young people come to, contact:
• Parenting Development Team on : 01865 876624
• Parent-Talk for parents of teenagers: 01865 875482
• For FREE independent education advice for 15-16 year olds: ACE Advisory
Centre for Education www.ace-ed.org.uk
• For information about health matters, the following links provide a wealth of information for Dads about parenting and fatherhood:
• For information about health matters: www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk or call 0845 4647
• The following links provide a wealth of information for Dads about parenting and fatherhood:
• www.talktoyourbaby.org.uk/dads
• www.dadtalk.co.uk
• www.young-fathers.org.uk
• www.dad.info
• www.oxpip.org.uk
• www.teenadvice.about.com
• www.parentchannel.tv
• www.daddybegood.com/
a site by Dads
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for Dads in
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Being A Dad Topics
Getting to know your child
Often the bond between mother and child is made stronger by the tasks of feeding, cleaning and nurturing. Dads sometimes feel helpless and left out, not knowing what to do. But getting involved in feeding, cleaning and nurturing will help Dads bond too. Professionals and family members may also forget that dad has an important role to play too. It can be exciting and rewarding.
Tips from OxonDads
• Accept your child as he or she is.
• Spend plenty of time just you and your baby doing activities that involve skin-to-skin contact. Changing nappies, cuddling, putting the baby to sleep, bathing, dressing and even (delete) just cooing and talking are all great relationship builders. They give you and the baby a chance to be alone together, and the more this happens, the more confident you will feel about your own abilities as a parent
• Touch, hold and cuddle your child.
• Spend as much time as you can just being with your baby. Take your baby for walks in the pram, put the baby in a sling and go shopping, or do whatever you can think of to be together.
• Listen to your child, even if he or she is too young to talk – s/he can certainly make noises!
• Talk to your child with a smile and eye contact from the start
• Try to copy his/her noises and expressions and see how s/he starts to respond.
• You may think that you can only sing in the shower but for your baby the sound of your voice, humming or singing, is music to its ears.
• Tell your child that you love him or her – often with a kiss, cuddle, gentle squeeze or touch.
• Be as supportive and helpful as you can towards your partner. Take on responsibility for chores that normally fall to her.
• Once you have got involved, don’t stop. You are now part of your child's life
Often the bond between mother and child is made stronger by the tasks of feeding, cleaning and nurturing. Dads sometimes feel helpless and left out, not knowing what to do. But getting involved in feeding, cleaning and nurturing will help Dads bond too. Professionals and family members may also forget that dad has an important role to play too. It can be exciting and rewarding.
Tips from OxonDads
• Accept your child as he or she is.
• Spend plenty of time just you and your baby doing activities that involve skin-to-skin contact. Changing nappies, cuddling, putting the baby to sleep, bathing, dressing and even (delete) just cooing and talking are all great relationship builders. They give you and the baby a chance to be alone together, and the more this happens, the more confident you will feel about your own abilities as a parent
• Touch, hold and cuddle your child.
• Spend as much time as you can just being with your baby. Take your baby for walks in the pram, put the baby in a sling and go shopping, or do whatever you can think of to be together.
• Listen to your child, even if he or she is too young to talk – s/he can certainly make noises!
• Talk to your child with a smile and eye contact from the start
• Try to copy his/her noises and expressions and see how s/he starts to respond.
• You may think that you can only sing in the shower but for your baby the sound of your voice, humming or singing, is music to its ears.
• Tell your child that you love him or her – often with a kiss, cuddle, gentle squeeze or touch.
• Be as supportive and helpful as you can towards your partner. Take on responsibility for chores that normally fall to her.
• Once you have got involved, don’t stop. You are now part of your child's life
Young Dads
For some young dads having a child may be planned as part of a loving relationship or marriage. For them fatherhood is a time of celebration. For others the pregnancy may be unplanned, and although celebrated it may not be welcome by everyone. As a result some people often see young fathers in a negative light; they can make young dads feel undervalued or sometimes excluded. Not surprisingly, we can often react by withdrawing, losing self-esteem and confidence. However, we do want to be part of our child’s life in one way or another.
Your responsibility as a young Dad
If you can arrange to register the birth of your baby together, you will automatically have parental responsibility. This will mean that you (along with your baby’s mum) can take full responsibility on the important decisions that affect your child.
Tips for young Dads from OxonDads
• Being a young Dad will be an emotional time for you as well as your partner. It is a huge responsibility, the biggest one you will ever have in your life. Talk to each other. Even if you are not with your partner, you can still be involved, so you need to communicate as and when you can
• Don’t panic! Talk to people who are closest to you; these could be parents, brothers or sisters, grandparents, a best friend, a work colleague, teacher or youth worker. Do not go through this on your own.
Growing Up
As your children get older, parents have different options to consider, for example whether you need childcare and if so which type is suitable.
Your child can go to Primary School from the September after their 4th birthday and Secondary School once they are 11 years old.
You may also feel you need information, support and advice on bringing up your child through the ‘terrible twos’ or the teenage years. It is important that Dads are involved in these matters. There is a vast amount of information and support available, often from other Dads themselves.
For some young dads having a child may be planned as part of a loving relationship or marriage. For them fatherhood is a time of celebration. For others the pregnancy may be unplanned, and although celebrated it may not be welcome by everyone. As a result some people often see young fathers in a negative light; they can make young dads feel undervalued or sometimes excluded. Not surprisingly, we can often react by withdrawing, losing self-esteem and confidence. However, we do want to be part of our child’s life in one way or another.
Your responsibility as a young Dad
If you can arrange to register the birth of your baby together, you will automatically have parental responsibility. This will mean that you (along with your baby’s mum) can take full responsibility on the important decisions that affect your child.
Tips for young Dads from OxonDads
• Being a young Dad will be an emotional time for you as well as your partner. It is a huge responsibility, the biggest one you will ever have in your life. Talk to each other. Even if you are not with your partner, you can still be involved, so you need to communicate as and when you can
• Don’t panic! Talk to people who are closest to you; these could be parents, brothers or sisters, grandparents, a best friend, a work colleague, teacher or youth worker. Do not go through this on your own.
Growing Up
As your children get older, parents have different options to consider, for example whether you need childcare and if so which type is suitable.
Your child can go to Primary School from the September after their 4th birthday and Secondary School once they are 11 years old.
You may also feel you need information, support and advice on bringing up your child through the ‘terrible twos’ or the teenage years. It is important that Dads are involved in these matters. There is a vast amount of information and support available, often from other Dads themselves.
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e: info@oxondads.co.uk